Shooting Star

If there's one thing I like about college... it's the internet. My mom has that 'internet wherever you are' thing... yeah, the program won't load on my computer, therefore, I have been cut off from the world unless I take those long trips to Panera.

Obviously, I survived midterms week... barely, but I did it. Tragedy struck about... 25, 000 times but that's okay. I came out alive in the end. I turned in the rough draft of my paideia research paper (*dies*) and did my super awesome speech for Public Address on the Merengue. I'm actually very proud of the speech. I finished my american politics paper on the continuity of government... religion... yeah... it's done at least. I'm not too anxious to see THAT grade.

Spring break was amazing and definitely needed after having all that stress the week before. There are many things I like about going home besides seeing my friends, mother, and doggies. For example, I'm quite fond of my air mattress and my couch. I'm quite fond of Chipotle and Panera and Starbucks. I'm very fond of driving my car and a Taco Bell that is open until 4am, as well as listening to the radio while I'm driving n the car and chilling with the homies a.k.a acting like losers. I also like that whole "no class and lots of sleep" thing. That's pretty nice. ;)

I went shopping while I was home and gave my mom my money from work-study for tuition... that was fun and painful. But I took a lot of clothes home because I knew I wasn't going to wear them and it was going to be a pain to pack up all the clothes at the end of the year... so I have new clothes and about half my closet. It's slightly pathetic considering how full my roommates' closets are. But there's not much I can do. I have a lot of stuff on my desk.

Alright, as lame as it sounds... it's bedtime. :B. I'm trying to maximize all the sleep I can. I've already showered and unpacked and I've decided to save my homework for an undetermined late and I plan on skipping paideia lecture. Hooray for terrible bad habits. XD.

I'm kidding. I would never skip paideia lecture.

Never.

Burn It to the Ground

This is midterm week. Last semester, that didn't really mean that much to me... but I'm definitely feeling it now. Actually, I'm feeling it now for last semester and this semester. I only had one midtern last semester and that was in the ever constant pain, paideia. It is totally kicking my butt. Along with religion. This is not a very good semester for me. T_T

Here's what's going down in Marcie World, and it's quite terrifying. Today has passed, and that was when I had to go into a panic (which is rare) because I had forgotten to do my application for the Diversity Center and it was due by 4:00. Instead of doing it like I had planned between American Politics and religion, I had taken a nap instead (great nap, in case you were wondering). So, that was completely my fault. Tomorrow, is Paideia Tuesday, as usual. I'll be slaving over that homework and pulling a very late night so that I can get a good grade. My goal for today is to finish transcribing all my interviews. I have the first one done and am starting the second one. The third one isn't very long, so I don't think it'll be a problem.

Wednesday is going to be a hard day. Not only is the paper due that day, but there's also a common quiz. I honestly think that paideia is out to get all the students.

Thursday, I have to give a speech in Public Address. For some reason, I thought we would do less speeching in speech, so I signed on for a course load I wasn't completely prepared for. I want to quit that class, but... compared to the others, it's fairly easy. You only worry about it on speech day.

Friday, I have my American Politics paper due... I'm very much in trouble for that because I don't know exactly what I'm supposed to do with it. I don't know if it's an opinion paper or a research one... because I haven't started and I haven't asked... because my bed always starts calling to me around 10:00... yeah. I'll probably shoot him an email and ask what exactly I'm supposed to do for the paper. Also, on Friday, I have my religion midterm and paideia midterm. They're both out to get me, I swear. Cool teachers... worst subjects EVER.

I have no idea if I'm in trouble, but... I think I have it. I think. I hope. Most likely... I have to get it sometime.

Long Hallway With a Broken Light

Before anyone worries too much about me, I'm ok. I had to cancel my interview, but we did it on Saturday and I'm still on track. However, it was a track of giant, mountain sized speed bumps and blood, sweat and tears. This is all paideia. I hate paideia, in case no one could tell.

I have a terrible transcribing story. Yesterday/this morning was the worst yesterday/this morning of my life. This is going to be hard to believe. But it happened. I have the tears and multiple bawling phone calls to prove it. I had over half of my first interview done and it was around 13 pages, so I figured I could just print that out quickly in case I didn't get around to it later on. When I was clicking out of Word, it asked me if I wanted to save it. I figured that I could work more and actually finish the whole first interview... so I clicked "no"... and now it's gone forever. I tried to recover it, but it's never coming back.

Yeah. I was stupid. I don't save though, I'm not a saver. And this isn't even the first time that's happened, it's just the first time I had spent seven hours and gotten that many pages doing it. Of course the library, the one really really quiet place on campus closes at midnight, so I spent a half an hour trying to find someplace else that was equally as quiet.

I didn't, by the way, but I borrowed someone else's headphones since half the reason I couldn't hear the interviewee was because my headphones are permanently broken (it seems selfish, but I kind of really want my mother to buy me new headphones... like replacement iPod headphones instead of the regular ones... and those are cheap... so I'd rather she bought it... I'm a jerk. Yes.) I think that might have cancelled everything out.

It really wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't been in the library for SEVEN HOURS when I am personally not a big fan of quiet places that are sometimes scenes in horror movies. And places where I actually have to shut my mouth and/or shut up in general. I'm not too good at that.

Yeah, and today isn't looking any better. I've been awake for two hours and I've almost died five times, my coffee is really gross (don't know why) and I pulled some stupids a few times already. I'm fully incompetent at work and religion so that should be a fun time.

So I Thought

I am overwhelmed. So what else is new, I guess. But this time, I genuinely have no idea what I'm going to do and how I should do it. I have a paideia research paper, which would normally take the backseat to everything else because... it's paideia and I hate it, but this time I can't do that. Because what I once said was cool... IS NOW TOTALLY UNCOOL. I have to do three interviews, all of which have to be two hours long. Then I have to transcribe and do research.

Yeah. I get wiped out thinking about it. But I'm not done.

I'm in Public Address, cool class. Absolutely hard. I have to write an informational speech and I've been completely unable to come up with a topic. I have to have it done by Thursday. I have my next interview on Wednesday. I'm scared that I'm going to ahve to cancel that interview because I have to work on my speech. I very much don't want to do that because I'm on a time constraint and it takes about 12 hours to transcribe 6 hours of interview time.

I'm in such trouble. Help?

I Can Do Better.

I'm feeling a little upset today, quite honestly. Today was the silent processional/prayer vigil for the illegal immigrants affected by the Postville Raid. I was asked to be a part of it and I procrastinated so much in the response that I ended up not answering at all.

Why had such a lowly freshman (not really) like me been asked to be a part of it?

I had been a campaign manager for Paideia for Postville, which was just a small fundraiser that was held in December when the churches were in need of help for all the immigrants they were hosting. We managed to raise a little more than 1,000 dollars (most likely much more, but I'm not completely sure) and sent it all to help with food and clothes, I believe. It was a really good effort put forth in the last few weeks of first semester. We did fairly well and there was a class representative and everything who harrassed everyone into donating.

And I was responsible for forwarding emails and all that jazz. I didn't do my job very well because I wasn't completely sure about what I was doing, but I was not alone in my endeavors. There was another girl working with me about it.

So for the vigil, we were asked to participate and share some words of prayer... Let me tell you, I am not that religious at all. In fact, defining myself as any religion is kind of frightening to me. Little to say, I'm not that big (or good) at praying. I can write a thesis better than I can pray and the thought of trying to do all that in front of people who want some deep, heartfelt words about the whole experience terrified me to the umpteenth level.

So I didn't go. And I regret that. I wanted to be a part of it badly. Sure, I didn't do much, but I have deep sympathy for the immigrants since I am one myself, although legal, and have friends that are illegal aliens. To me, it was definitely something to fight for, but I couldn't muster the courage to share some words.

Epic fail?

I think so.

Spaceman

Not much has happened this week, I'll be brutally honest. People are getting slapped with the reality that second semester is no joke. And trust me... it's no joke. Paideia is still a killer, but we already have a paper due that is apparently so important that I have to stay up until... now (2:48) to finish writing it. It's really just a response paper.

Religion kicked my butt on Friday. Let's talk about my Friday. It was a good day. All I had was paideia in the morning and then choir in the afternoon because two of my other classes were cancelled. It was a good day. I went back to my dorm and read the bible homework that I hadn't done and took a short nap. I planned to wake up at 11:00 so that I could have the response in by 11:30. We had a write at least 500 words on the prompt. Not hard right?

I turned in 200 words. That's not even half of what we needed. It was my first grade in the class and it was an epic fail. Of course, maybe it would have helped if I read any of the homework at all, but the question was not based on any of the other readings we had to do! I was ashamed. It wasn't even that I said all that could be said. I had no idea what to say--actually, I ended up confusing myself to the point where it went beyond just drowning.

Little to say... I hate religion right now. It shouldn't be as hard as it is. I went to church. I sometimes listened! I was confirmed and "read" the bible for confirmation.

Alright, I just fell asleep there for five minutes, so I'm going to turn in. Write more later.

The Art of Losing (your mind to work-study)

Work-study. The ever constant thorn in my side. Sure, I have interesting stories to tell about my experiences, but that doesn't take away the fact that it sucks. Intensely. It pretty much sucks all the blood, life, and essence out of your life.

I'm not kidding.

This week was the first week of school. I was super happy because I no longer had hours in the caf and all of them were at Marty's. Trust me, it's infinitely more cooler. ;). I had all my hours planned and I was dealing with the fact that I would have to get up at 8am even on Saturdays. Horrible, I know, but it gave me a chance to have a weekend, at least. I had all ten hours, which was nice, considering how I had nine last semester, and I was prepared for lift-off.

And then I was crashed/emergency landed. My friend that I thought I was working my 3-hour Saturday shift with said that she didn't see me on the schedule for that particular shift. I shimmied on over to Marty's and assessed the situation. And it was bad. Apparently, there had been a miscommunication and that shift was taken away from me and given to someone else. I had to find three hours or suffer the consequences of super-poverty.

It put a damper on my day, that was for sure. I found out I was three hours in the hole an hour before I had to go into work as a cleaner. I hate cleaning. I really do, but that's what I signed on for. It was an unhappy day indeed. I was terrified I was going to have to go to the caf to get hours, which would very much break my soul.

Luckily, one of the workers was canceling one of her shifts and it was on a day that I wasn't working.

You are now reading the blog of someone who has 9 hours (again! ><) and works Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday.

I don't advise doing that. I'm certain my sleep will suffer. But the things I do for money...